What to talk with a girl on phone. Part 9

What to talk with a girl? Well, my dear reader, so far so simple? Further, it’s no more complicated. However, considering the stage of a telephonic conversation, I want to make a reservation that this is the most crucial stage of the dating process on the Internet. You must clearly understand what to talk with the girl on the phone.

After the girl with genuine desire revealed to you the secret of the numbers that make up her phone number, you have to call her.

And even if you can easily meet a girl in a “living”, non-virtual world, without having the experience of dating on a global network, you may still think about what to talk with the girl on phone.

In Part 7, I promised to explain why I tend to use the correspondence template contained in Dialogue No. 8

1. Time saving.
2. Efficiency – it immediately becomes clear what the girl wants to get from meeting on the site: to get to know you better and get in touch, and then at least meet, or kill time using meaningless correspondence (“looking for friends”). You know how annoying it was when it took you half an hour to virtual chat, and then you were refused a phone number.
3. I remind you that the purpose of correspondence with a girl is to get a phone number to subsequently phone. Girls are most often slave by nature and communication sometimes resembles a game of questions and answers, and a man asks questions. If in the process of correspondence you learned a lot about a girl, what else will you ask her when will you call her?
4. The above example of correspondence may seem too ascetic, so if you wish, you can expand it a little, but do not overdo it.

When to call a girl

It’s better to call on the day when the girl shared with you the secret that she has – the phone number. No desire, call the next day.

In general, the main thing is to call on the day that you agreed to call, but if it didn’t work out and the week passed, it’s okay to call boldly, because girls are the most understanding people on the planet.

What to talk with a girl on phone and how to talk

“Women love with their ears.” Have you heard about this? The way it is.

By and large, what to talk about and how to do it is not important, the main thing is to speak in principle, not to be silent.

From the NLP course, one can draw such a wonderful thing as a “bredogenerator”. The bredogenerator is the ability to speak without stopping on any topic, which is a continuation of any thought that purposefully or accidentally become the guest in your mind.

To work out bredogenerator, you need to constantly practice your communication skills, plunged headlong into the clear waters of gender communication.

If Edward, who lives in you, and his bredogenerator have not yet reached the level of professionalism, striving for 100 %, then, you might still want to know how and what should I communicate during a phone call.

Important recommendations

1. The duration of the telephone call should be optimal

If you don’t know what to talk about over the phone with a girl for a long time, it’s good, because the inability to get away from a long conversation is a sign of unprofessionalism.

Moreover, since a man is obliged to control the communication process, you must very clearly imagine how and at what point it is necessary to stop communicating by phone.

You must be prepared to abruptly stop the conversation, and this requirement again makes us look in the direction of efficiency.

Suppose a situation in which the purpose of your call is to meet on the day it is made, but as a result of a telephone conversation it becomes clear that the girl has a headache, she was busy all day and very tired, and indeed now the interlocutor is with her grandmother in the village and will arrive next week.

Due to the lack of worthy partners for communication in the communication radius, you will, of course, be chosen as the ideal interlocutor.

Not forgetting that the reason for the call was the appointment, in the presence of a limited amount of time, you should say goodbye as soon as possible to call the next girl.

Having talked a little, you can say that you need to go to a neighbor who needs help in delivering the refrigerator to the 3rd floor, or your father, work colleague, etc. calls on the second line, and you will have to say until dates, having previously found out when the girl will have free time next time.

Oddly enough, in reality, the biggest problem when talking on the phone is not the development of the ability to talk a lot, but the formation of professionalism in concise, concise, efficient communication, lasting from 7 to 15 minutes.

If the ability to speak for a long time is interesting and fun enough well developed, if you have a margin of time, you should make maximum use of these opportunities, since every word that you say to a girl on the phone is evaluated by her, and the higher the average score of such testing, the more you will get closer to yourself to a girl before the moment of meeting, the more all your imperfections will be smoothed out when she sees you if any.

In this case, the ideal duration of communication will be from 30 minutes to 1 hour. But this, I repeat, is not the main thing.

You, dear reader, should be as effective as possible, which means a minimum waste of time for each girl.

Moreover, in the event of an emergency appointment in a limited amount of time, a lengthy telephone conversation is contraindicated.

2. Lack of internal dialogue

If you possess the abilities of easy easy communication, then the main rule for you before making a call will be the absence of internal dialogue – you should not think about what to say to the girl on the phone, what she will think about, what will be her reaction to those or other words you said just dial the number and talk.

You should understand that getting to know girls is a duel that is initially conducted in unequal conditions.

Men always have an advantage, because women are very rarely the initiators of dating and, as a result, practically don’t know the art of seduction.

That is why all men’s failures in the field of interpersonal relationships are not a loss to the enemy in the face of women, but only to themselves and for one reason only – insufficient development of communication skills, which, like trees in the garden, sprout and develop with proper care and after some time necessarily bear fruit.

With each call, whether it was brilliant or unsuccessful, your skills are improved. Every loss today is a victory tomorrow but on a larger scale. Each “no” becomes an occasion to go to the goal with even greater pressure, makes you change and adapt, become better and improve.

Anyway, why worry about anything if you might never see the girl you called. Just treat phone calls as a necessary practice.

3. Planning a telephone conversation

If, nevertheless, ease of communication is not your strong point at the moment, then take advantage of the main advantage of online dating – the lack of visual contact in the initial stages of seduction.

A girl can’t watch what you do during a telephone conversation. In the presence of excitement, you can do things that can reassure you: stand, sit, lie down, smoke, drink coffee.

And, most importantly, you can prepare for a telephone conversation by drawing up a communication plan. Having a telephone conversation plan on a piece of paper, you can simply repeat the same thing to each girl.

Don’t worry, usually, they are not familiar with each other and will not share the contents of your dialogue. Yes, and why torment your imagination, if there is already a proven strategy, they do not know about it.

That is why, the less you know about a girl in the process of online correspondence, the more you can ask her questions by phone.

Basic template

1. Hi, this is … (your name) from a dating site. What are you doing?
2. Have you been registered on the site for a long time?
3. Has anyone met in real life?
4. What are your impressions of communication?
5. What do you do in life: study, work? (if the girl is older, then you should not ask about the study: “What do you do in life, in what area do you work?”)
6. What do you usually do in your free time?
7. What are your plans for today (tomorrow, weekend)?
8. (if busy) And when do you have weekends? (When will you have free time?)
9. (if free) Let’s meet. I want to invite you to visit.

This is the skeleton on which you will build the muscle of a telephone conversation.

How to extend the duration of communication by phone? You can say anything.

Regarding training, ask how many more years to study, when will the next session be, insert memories of your studies at the educational institution, opinions about teachers, interesting cases when passing exams, etc.

About work – how long she works, whether work is liked (why not), when there are weekends. There are a lot of professions: one of the girls will work as a teacher at school, some as a seller, accountant, conductor, lawyer, psychologist, doctor, etc.

Surely you have questions for any representative of these professions, so take this opportunity, ask about what interests you.

You can also find out in what area of the city the girl lives, if there is a child, ask the son or daughter how old the child is, where her husband went, if he was, with whom the interlocutor lives (a girl with free living space will never interfere).

Maybe you are familiar with astrology? Then specify who the girl is in the zodiac sign and tell the main features of her character.

Extract from any thoughts on any topic, express your opinion on certain issues, remember funny cases from your life.

If the girl is old enough, then she has already formed her view of the world around her, and sometimes it’s enough to just ask something, and then listen, listen and listen to what she tells, and even have to answer the questions posed by her.

With very young people, most often the situation is different – dialogue can turn into a monologue, become a one-man theater, where you have to play all the roles, but nothing can confuse real men.

If something went wrong, you hesitated, do not know what else to say, your nephews ran into your room, ready to destroy everything in their path, immediately remember that you are a professional in the field of controlling the process of communication and having in stock infinite the number of reasons for the termination of the telephone conversation, explain that the current events do not allow you to continue communication and promise to phone somehow.

It may turn out that the girl is ready to meet, but just not at your place, and you have no desire to walk with her because you pursue somewhat different goals.

Then you need to explain that yesterday you were in the bars and discos so much that there is no energy at all to go out, and if the weather is bad outside, there’s another additional incentive.

If the interlocutor continues to oppose your invitation, you ask the question: “What will you do next weekend?” After receiving the answer (most likely it will be something like, “I don’t know, I still have to live up to the weekend”), you immediately add “Let’s get in touch next week and come up with something.” “I was glad to hear from you. Till.”. And you never call her again.

To develop easy communication, imagine that you are communicating with the person whom you have long known and with whom you are ready to communicate for hours on end. Maybe this is your sister, colleague, just a friend. Move away from yourself, for a girl you are not you, but just a voice over the phone.

Remember that a telephone conversation is likely to turn out to be very easy, because, using the selection concept, you didn’t allow yourself to communicate with “difficult” girls.

But if, in addition to this, you also really enjoyed talking to your interlocutor, do not make a mistake – do not penetrate the girl very much, otherwise, you may start to think that your plans are too insidious for this sweet person. In this case, remember your goal and do not lose sight of it.

Specific patterns

The patterns of what to say to the girl on the phone, as well as the patterns of Internet messages, depending on the conditions in which the acquaintance passes.

1. Meeting with a girl face to face in the presence of time for preparation

In principle, almost all the recommendations mentioned above in the current article related to this particular point, except two things that need to be clarified.

The duration of a telephone conversation has not been specifically described. So still 7-15 minutes or from 30 minutes to 1 hour?

My answer is: if you like how the communication proceeds by phone, maximize the communication time.

If there is even the slightest discomfort, you have an unpleasant aftertaste from communication, maybe the girl is not interested in you, which will be expressed in the fact that the interlocutor does not ask anything about you, but only answers your questions, or, perhaps, this is due to the girl being in a state of slight shy excitement, in which case, why not waste time.

Say that you invite the girl to your home to visit. In case of refusal, find out what the interlocutor will do next weekend, let me know that you can phone next week and think of something because today you definitely won’t leave the house (tired the day before), say that you were glad to hear it and say goodbye forever.

If the girl did not say no about your invitation, but today she doesn’t succeed, say goodbye to her, but call her back somehow.

The second nuance is the moment of invitation to visit.

If there is enough time and in the case of a successful dialogue, the best choice would be to not invite the girl to your home at the first call. Let it take several days and the girl, scrolling through the telephone conversation in her head, will miss you. Then you will call on Friday evening or Saturday afternoon and reveal your cards.

Arrange for a possible meeting (exactly possible, nothing concrete, no promises) over the weekend with several girls, with at least three – so you increase your chances.

What argument can be used as the reason for your inability to see the girl: I went to the cottage, and when you get back, today or tomorrow, you don’t know. Thus, you explained to the girl why it was not possible to meet most likely, but not at all.

If something goes wrong with that girl whom you did not refuse your hospitality, you always have the opportunity to call and inform that you returned from the cottage.

I don’t know how everything will turn out for you, but from my experience, I’ll say that when I specifically made an appointment with several girls, and then I invited one of them to visit me, refusing the others, I often never and did not see.

In the cycle of our information age, girls can very quickly forget about everything, even about such a wonderful person who you are.

2. An emergency meeting with a girl in the absence of sufficient time for dating

This situation makes it much easier. It has already become clear to you that the girl does not want to be bored today, and you would be a good source of her entertainment.

1. Hi, this is … (your name). What are you doing?
2. What do you do in life: study, work? (if the girl is older, then you should not ask about the study: “What do you do in life, in what area do you work?”)
3. Well then, let’s see you later. Come to visit.
4. (if she doesn’t agree to visit) Today I’m not leaving the house – I’m tired. Unfortunately, we will not see each other. Come on, maybe we’ll call you next week and come up with something. I was glad to hear from you. Till.

3. The invitation of two girls (girls and her friends) in the company of two guys

Even easier.

1. Hi, this is … (your name). What are you doing?
2. So, take a friend and come visit.
3. I AM …
4. Then you and your friend phoned, and she will call you back within 10 minutes.

My dear reader, based on the foregoing, you might think that I forbid walking with girls and force them to invite to their homes in large numbers. This is not true.

In this case, the main thing is the goal that you pursue.

If you want to meet a girl in neutral territory – for God’s sake. But if you have no desire, and you are seduced by the counter-proposal of the interlocutor, then this resembles a lack of willpower or slavery, as you prefer.

Don’t forget that the selection continues at the stage of a telephone conversation (“Don’t want, how you want”).

I recommend taking it not by quality, but by quantity, in any case, in the beginning, because communication is one of the spheres of human life, in which, over time, the quantity necessarily turns into quality.

In the next article, read how to behave on a date with a girl.