Change in behavior: When people suddenly begin to behave unusually, this is a sure sign that something is wrong with them. Remember: we behave depending on what we currently feel. Potential suicides are usually sad, thoughtful or inflated, embittered, often hate themselves. The behavior and appearance of those who bear suicide plans manifest their negative emotions.
If for some reason your friend’s usual behavior has suddenly changed, if several weeks have passed and you don’t recognize him, then something has happened to him. The main words “changed” and “for some reason suddenly”; it is not essential in this case that he behaves differently, but that he behaves differently than before.
For example, you may not like that your friend likes to sleep and never wakes up before noon, but such habits are not evidenced that he will stop sleeping at night, for no reason will turn into a nervous, quick-tempered fidget, who does not find a place – you will have every reason to worry.
Pay attention to the change in the behavior of your relatives and friends in the following ways.
Food: Teenagers with a good appetite become picky, and those who ate little pounce on food. Accordingly, thin teenagers get fat, and well-fed, on the contrary, lose weight.
Sleep: Most suicidal teens sleep all day; some, on the contrary, lose sleep and turn into “owls”; until late, they walk up and down their room, some lie down only in the morning, awake for no apparent reason.
School: Many students who previously studied “good” and “excellent” begin to skip, their performance drops sharply. Those who used to walk in the lagging behind are now often expelled from school.
Appearance: There are cases when suicidal adolescents stop monitoring their appearance. They do not comb their hair, clumsy dress and even stop taking showers in the morning. The teenagers who find themselves in a crisis situation are untidy, they walk in crumpled and dirty clothes, and it seems that they are completely indifferent to the impression they make.
Activity: Teenagers in crisis are losing interest in everything they used to love. Athletes leave their teams, musicians stop playing musical instruments, while those who did a jog every morning, cool down for this lesson. Many cease to meet friends, shun old companies, keep apart.
The desire for solitude: Suicidal adolescents are often immersed in themselves, shunned by others, close, do not go out of their corner for a long time. They put on headphones, turn on music, and turn off life. Sometimes they try to leave quietly so that no one would pay attention to their absence.
Sometimes they behave in a pointed manner: as if they are disgusted with life, and with their whole appearance they make it clear – they are tired of everything and everything. If your completely sociable friend unexpectedly, it is not clear for what reason becomes closed and uncommunicative, refuses to meet with peers, then he might have thought about death.
Bereavement: The death of loved ones: parents or brothers and sisters can prompt thoughts of the suicide of adolescents. After such a loss, the teenager’s life changes in the most decisive way, now he has to not only reconcile with the loss of his beloved person but also to close the gap that this loss has made in his life. Some teenagers cannot imagine how they will live without a father or mother, brother or sister.
Losses from which your friend suffers, are not limited to the death of loved ones. Some Teens begin to think about suicide after a quarrel with the girlfriend or having endured the divorce of parents.
Sometimes young people do not want to live anymore if they have suffered a serious illness or if they have had an accident that disfigured them.
Remember, everyone suffers a loss in his own way. A loss that may seem insignificant to you will be irreparable for your friend; having changed his entire subsequent life, such a loss could push him to suicide.
Distribution of valuables: People about to die often give away things that mean a lot to them. If your friend is considering committing suicide, he may start handing out his favorite CDs, videotapes, posters.
Teenagers are known for their generosity, but if you give something without any reason and if a gift brought to your friend’s expensive stuff, this should make you suspicious. Be on the alert if thus your friend will say: “this thing I no longer need” or “I want you to have something left from my memory.”
Putting things in order: Some suicidal adolescents will hand out their favorite things, others will find it necessary to “put their affairs in order” before death. Some will rush to clean the house, others will hasten to pay off their debts, sit down for a letter that they should have answered a long time ago, or they want to return a thing taken from a friend, wash the floor in the room, take apart the drawers of the desk.
There is nothing suspicious in all these actions; on the contrary, in itself, each of them is completely normal and regular. However, in combination with other “warning signs”, such a sudden craving for order may mean that your friend is not going to linger in this world for a long time.
Be especially careful if a friend starts a conversation with you about a will, about morgues, crematoriums, and funerals; if he becomes interested in funeral rituals, funeral music, wreaths, tombstones, etc.
Aggression, rebellion and disobedience. Teenagers who want to part with life are often infringed and embittered: they are angry with parents, teachers or friends who did not please them with something, offended them, did not live up to expectations. It happens that they are angry with themselves, and their anger is manifested in aggression, rebellion and disobedience.
Like any change in mood, such “explosions” should be alarming. They can annoy not only those against whom aggression is directed but also everyone around. After all, no one wants to deal with an embittered, quick-tempered, unpredictable person – and as a result, your friend will be involuntarily isolated, just those people who could provide real help if necessary will turn his back on him. Loneliness only “tunes in to a suicidal mood”, which is why your friend is in great danger of falling into the zone of suicidal risk.
If you found yourself avoiding a friend just because it suddenly became difficult to deal with him, think about what was happening to him. Has your friend ever been aggressive and non-living? Has he been rude to parents, teachers, friends before? Is it usually when something is done against his will, to him “to evil” that he is rude? Can you imagine why your friend is so annoyed? If the answers to all these questions are negative, then he was in trouble, thinking about suicide, waiting for help.
Self-destructive and risky behavior: Some suicide teenagers constantly seek to harm themselves, behave “at risk”. No matter where they were at brisk intersections, on the coiling mountain road, on a narrow bridge or on railway tracks they go everywhere at the speed limit and risk. Bravado and diligence to convince all that they all uneasy, they heard every word.
Some young people at risk of suicide no longer care about their health. They can start to smoke and drink a lot, they can use drugs or combine drugs with alcohol.
It happens that suicidal adolescents, especially girls, begin to starve. Those who suffer from anorexia (this is a painful lack of appetite) stop eating completely or eat very little, at the limit of the possible. Those with bulimia (this is an unhealthy wolf appetite) cause vomiting after each meal. It is believed that these girls are starving and exhausted, as they strive to maintain their shape at all costs, but many psychologists and psychotherapists see in these eating disorders not so much a desire to lose weight as a cry for help.
If your calm and composed friend suddenly begins to take risks or intentionally harms their health, it is possible that he planned to commit suicide.
The loss of self-esteem. There are days when every teenager feels the ugliest, most awkward and most stupid creature in the world. However, such “self-flagellation” usually lasts long. There is some kind of a pleasant surprise, and self-flagellation is replaced by narcissism, everything falls into place. As a rule, young people have self-esteem and confidence, enabling them to survive difficult times, and mood swings, which they are so exposed.
Quite another matter teenagers who lost self-esteem. They look like they lost something. Back is a question mark. In the eyes not looking. Say phrases like “Nothing works out for me” or “What a fool I am!”, or “Nobody wants me!” The disgusting thing is that they believe that. The impression is if they can’t even imagine that someone treats them differently.
Low self-esteem causes adolescents to treat themselves without respect. They consider themselves worthless, unnecessary and unloved, they feel that they are outsiders and losers that they have nothing and that nobody loves them.
In this case, they may have thought that it would be better if they die.
Remember these warning signs!
If your friend is:
- threatening to commit suicide;
- demonstrates sudden mood swings;
- recently suffered a bereavement;
- distributes favorite things;
- leads Affairs in order;
- becomes aggressive, revolts do not wish to listen;
- lives at risk, it is not saving herself;
- lost self-esteem, —
perhaps, he considers thought of Commission of suicide attempts.
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